Go Whitlock...Screw Wilbon

Jason Whitlock is one of the last true editorialists. You hate him one day and you love him the next. Isn't that great, a columnist with no allegiance. ESPN shoved him out the door a year ago for not giving out canned opinions. Now we're left with the ESPN sheep. Neat a network where everyone shares the same opinion. At least in news you get a choice with FOX or CNN. In sports you have no choice. Michael Wilbon referred to Imus as a Klansman the other day and said that he's...GASP!...always mean to Hillary Clinton. Hmm...wonder what the real problem Michael Wilbon has with Don Imus. Anyways back to Whitlock. He writes:

"Rather than inspire us to seize hard-earned opportunities, Jesse and Al have specialized in blackmailing white folks for profit and attention. They were at it again last week, helping to turn radio shock jock Don Imus’ stupidity into a world-wide crisis that reached its crescendo Tuesday afternoon when Rutgers women’s basketball coach C. Vivian Stringer led a massive pity party/recruiting rally. Hey, what Imus said, calling the Rutgers players "nappy-headed hos," was ignorant, insensitive and offensive. But so are many of the words that come out of the mouths of radio shock jocks/comedians."
http://sports.aol.com/whitlock/_a/time-for-jackson-sharpton-to-step-down/20070411111509990001

Biff Tannen's Almanac

Only two NBA games tonight. Good news is we aren't touching either spread. So you have no reason to watch And 1 basketball. Just the majors tonight. And we picked a great game!

Royals at Orioles...Wow, now this is what baseball is all about. The only reason they play games like this is so disgusting saps like us will bet on it...your friends will envy your gambling problem.

And that's the only game we like tonight baseball. So with only one game. Make sure you put all your eggs in one basket.

NBA (5-2-1), MLB Underdogs (6-3)

Biff Tannen's Almanac

Only two NBA games we're betting on tonight...the season is almost over (thank God) and all the players will find a way to care less and think more about their personal stats. We aren't sure if their talent is being lazy and selfish or if these guys are actually professional basketball players.

NBA: Mavs +2 1/2 at T-Wolves- You get two in one. Bet on the Mavs and against the T-Wolves.
Jazz E vs Nuggets: Oh look neat Iverson and Anthony on the same team. They still suck.

MLB: Brewers at Marlins: Sergio Mitre has been holding somebody hostage in the Marlins front office and they have no choice but to let him pitch.
Mariners at Red Sox: Bet against Dice K (God, what a gay nickname) and you'll hate him even more when you lose your money.

Twins vs Yankees: We lost on this game last night. Lets do the smart thing and chase our money.

Record...NBA (4-1-1), MLB (3-3)

Maybe If It Was Like Blades Of Steel It Would Be Cool

You're standing around at work, having a decent discussion on last evenings baseball game or talking about who your team should pick in the NFL draft...when hockey guy shows up. Of course he rudely interrupts and brings up how his hockey team dismantled some other insignificant hockey team 2-1. His irrelevant declaration is usually followed with an awkward silence then statement like...
"Oh yeah...I think I saw that on Sportscenter the other night that they're in the playoffs (along with every other team) while I was waiting for the Red Sox highlights. Or at least I think it was them. Hmm...no might have been the Penguins. Oh well, it was somebody. Don't they have that guy Forsberg or Yzerman (naming 2 of the 5 guys in the league that we've all heard of)? Well yeah, I hope they do well...those guys sure can skate."
And by the time that is over your legitimate sports conversation is gone thanks to hockey dick (you were just about to make the prediction of a lifetime on how some utility guy on your team is going to win rookie of the year). Everyone scrams back to their cubicle and annoying hockey guy has once again stepped in with his garbage and ruined what was an intriguing conversation. He knows nobody there likes hockey but thinks. A) Everyone will think I'm cool when I give them the scoop on the sport they know nothing about. B) If I keep talking about hockey they'll eventually like it.

Here's a perfect example of why this sport makes no damn sense. The New Jersey Devils, one of the best teams in hockey fire their coach right when the playoffs are about to start. I had no idea this happened until my friend told me. Can you imagine this happening in a real sport? Hell remember the Shottenheimer debacle. That move came AFTER the season and ESPN gave it 1/3 the attention they're giving the Imus mess (which is an enormous amount). And for a moment lets skip over the part where nobody gave a rats arse that it happened. Thing is it doesn't matter in the long run. What does a hockey coach do anyway? They stand around with their arms folded. Usually once a year one of them will try to climb that glass shield and act like they are going to fight another coach or a fan. But do they actually do anything? If I ever own a hockey team, we'll save a lot of money and just not have a coach.And Hockey fans don't worry if your team gets knocked out of the playoffs, next season starts up in a week or two.

Herpies, Horses, and The Olympics...ALL IN ONE STORY!

Next year's equistrian event at the Olympics should be fun.
A total of 132 Hong Kong race horses were infected with equine herpes in the territory's worst outbreak of the disease, a year before the city will host the equestrian event of the 2008 Beijing Olympics. http://www.kentucky.com/232/story/38768.html
Man, can't wait for this. We know the Asians have those zany game shows you see on Spike TV all time, but aren't they going a little far with this one? Somebody check and see where Mike Vick is.

Biff Tannen's Almanac

Today's gambling. Go get that money your kid has been saving for his new bike. After you make these bets you can get him a BMX instead of that crappy Huffy.

Knicks +13 at Bulls...are the Knicks this bad? We'll find out.

Grizzlies +3 1/2 vs Clippers...the Grizzlies wow the home crowd of 15 by pulling off the upset.

Wizards +4 vs Nets...Gilbert Arenas is gone, this is a good thing.

Cardinals at Pirates...The Cards are dogs to the Pirates for the second day in a row...Take advantage, we did yesterday.

Orioles vs Tigers....Jaret Wright finally becomes good on his 25th team. Plus the Tigers one good season is over.

Twins vs Yankees...The Bombers send an overrated Andy Pettite to the hill in Minnesota. Take the Twins when they're dogs in the dome.

Record...NBA (3-0), MLB (2-1)

Nick The Dick

They haven't even made it through a spring in Tuscaloosa and Nick Saban is already pissing people off there. We don't know how Saban does it, but in a weird way we kind of admire it. He can be a dick anywhere at anytime. Although we would never want to interview the prick. Montgomery Advertiser columnist Josh Moon writes. http://www.montgomeryadvertiser.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070408/SPORTS/704080337/1055

"He was overrated at Michigan State, overrated at LSU and rated about right in Miami. He's an average coach who, through mostly media attention, has garnered this reputation of being a great coach."

Wow, normally writers slam coaches but that was just a big FUCK YOU NICK SABAN. Looks like something an Auburn fan would post on a message board. Don't worry, future Rhodes Scholars Saban and Tyde Witt will eventually deal with the evil Mr. Moon. That's what deez her boys is being bred fer. http://www.decaturdaily.com/decaturdaily/news/070323/fans.shtml